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Sunday, September 25, 2011

A Delicate Balance

It is easy to say that I refuse to allow migraines to control my life...easy to say, hard to do.  Sometimes it is a delicate balance between the pain and my medication--how bad will it get, how much pain can I stand,when should I take the medication which will knock me out.  Sometimes I can gauge it, often times I guess wrong and by the time I take my medication it is too late.

So, when I met with my neurologist this time, I spoke to him about going back on Topamax--or "Dopamax" as many of us call it.  When I was on it before, I went I had memory and processing problems.  As a sign language interpreter, the processing problems were the worst for me.  I would work with Deaf people that I had know for years, but I couldn't understand them.  I know the memory problems were hard on my family.  I would repeat myself to my husband several times.  Some days I would ask him the same question over and over again, because I didn't remember asking him.  For him, it was like living with someone with early stage Alzheimer's--only I was in my thirties.  It was frustrating for both of us.

It wasn't an easy decision to go back on the Topamax.  My doctor decided to keep me on a low dose of it, to increase my dosage of Clonazepam and decrease my Nortriptyline dosage.  Including my vitamin supplements, I am taking 8 pills before bed at night.


I have been tracking my migraines (yes, there's an app for that!) and have found that they have decreased since adding Topamax back into my regimen.  I have asked my family and coworkers to watch for memory issues, and I am happy to report that so far no one has noticed a significant problem.


It is still a delicate balance between medication and control over my life.  I hate taking so many pills, but I know that without them I wouldn't be able to function.  However, I have to monitor to ensure that my medications don't impede my ability to function, as well.

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